22 March 2012

Exclusive: those London Underground bonus strings revealed

Britain's most loony union - the RMT - has walked out of negotiations over an £850 Olympic bonus payment claiming that it came with 'strings attached'. By spooky coincidence I stumbled across a paper marked 'private and confidential' at St James's Park tube station (Underground HQ) on my way home this evening.

In it, it revealed management's demands of tube drivers in order for them to receive this £850 bonus:

1. Turn up in time for work

2. Get in cab

3. Start motors

4. Drive train

5. Errr that's it

6. Oh no it isn't - remember to stop at red signals.

Tube drivers earn a minimum of £43,000 a year and all tube trains are capable of driverless operation.

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